I had almost given up on men altogether after being hurt and disappointed so many times, but then I met Mike.
Please help me – how do I know if he’s the right one?
” Hi Lucy, Thank you so much for sharing your story.
I can tell you now that you are absolutely not alone in feeling like this – it can be so hard to know whether a man is really all that he seems to be, especially when we have had bad experiences in the past. When a man is humble about his achievements and attributes, it shows that he does not always put himself at the centre of the universe and can recognize and value the contributions of others.
Unfortunately, there is no hard-and-fast answer to whether a man is right for you, as only YOU know how being with your man makes you feel. Answering these questions should give you a good indication of whether Mike has a sense of purpose and direction in his life. If your man is humble, he will be quietly confident and may downplay his achievements. A trustworthy man can be relied on to follow through with his plans and promises.
I just received this really heartfelt email from Lucy from North Carolina, and decided I had to share her story and my reply with you, as this is something we ALL need to know.
Lucy’s story really touched me because I realised as I was reading that so many women (including myself) have faced the same problem: how do you know if a guy is truly right for you? I’m a 39 year old woman with two kids who has been divorced for about 5 years now.Over the last two years I’ve finally worked up the courage to start dating again.I have seen a number of guys over that time but have found that most were either just wanting casual sex rather than a relationship, or were too self-absorbed and immature to handle the thought of children.However, there are characteristics to always look for when working out whether a man will make a good relationship partner. He will take interest in others and praise them on their efforts. Does he boast about his achievements or does he tend to minimize these? He will speak his true thoughts and make you feel safe and secure. The last trait we are going to look at is acceptance.Dr Ali Binazir, author of the bestselling ‘The Tao of Dating’, has some great advice on how to spot good men from the bad. Having a sense of purpose in life shows that a man is mature, motivated and knows where he wants to go in life. Does he spend more time talking about himself or about you? Lucy: Does Mike follow through with what he says he will do? It is important for a man to be able to accept himself and others the way they are, rather than always look for what could be changed.Today I will be breaking down 5 of Dr Binazir’s ‘good guy’ traits to look out for, so that you can tell if the man you are seeing is worth trusting with your heart. A man with a sense of purpose is much more likely to know what he wants in a partner and be more committed to a relationship. Does he answer personal questions openly and honestly rather than trying to dodge or avoid them? Consideration is all about thinking of others and their needs. Although self-improvement is great, a man who accepts himself will be generally very comfortable with who he is.